Friday at Five: Others Focused, Living to 100, and Cold Brew Coffee
Happy Friday, friends!
This is a great Friday for you to be on the newsletter. I love all five of the things below. I hope your Friday is better because of it!
On a side note, send me back what YOU want to hear more of. I've got so many interests like reading, writing, running, snacks, quotes, stories, personal development, leadership, personal finance, marriage, parenting, and more. This newsletter is what we make it, not just me.
Now on to this week's Friday at Five to help us finish the week well:
💬 "We can stop asking what others can do for us, and start asking what we can do for others."
- Show Your Work
🤔 "Here I Am" or "There You Are"
In a conversation last year, friends of mine discussed a simple thought that I've come back to over and over again. "When you walk into this room, you can either walk in with a "Here I am!" disposition or a "There you are!" disposition."
That's a phenomenal thought.
We are all drawn to the "there you are" type of people. These are the people that light up when you walk into the room. They're interested in your life. They make everyone around them better.
But the undercurrent of pride, insecurity, selfishness, and other forces draw us towards being the "here I am" type of person. We want to talk about subjects we like. We want people to be focused on us. In short, we want the world to revolve around us.
As I've spent time thinking about all this, there are two thoughts I actively engage to help me move towards being a "there you are" type of person:
- The person in front of me is smart and skilled in areas I'm clueless in.
Everyone has a set of life experiences that I don't. They know about a subject, a system, a piece of technology, a story in history, a health tip, a productivity tip, or something else that I haven't spent a second thinking of. Instead of trying to share all my insights and brilliance, isn't it worth discovering what the person in front of me knows? We can learn from anyone. Really.
- The person in front of me has unique challenges and pains right now.
Ask someone, "What's challenging right now? What are the hard parts of your life?" All of a sudden, you'll hear about a family member in the hospital, the drama at work, the financial strain of an unexpected car repair, and the list goes on. When you hear about someone else's challenges, it is easier to lean in, listen, and see that person. You move from self-focused on your challenges to engaged in active listening to someone else's.
What's ironic is that the more you are able to live with a "there you are" type of disposition, the more everything else takes care of itself. That's true at work, in marriage, in parenting, and all the other worlds you live in.
💰 Affordable Cold Brew Coffee
I love a good cold-brew coffee. Even in the cold weather. (I like what I like... okay...?) As it turns out, this is usually the most expensive type of coffee in a shop, expensive to buy in a grocery store, and not all that clear how to make it at home.
Then, I found out you can buy a pitcher with a filter to put coffee grounds in and soak for 48 hours. Get yourself a big bag of beans from Sam's or Costco to keep the party really budget-friendly. The one I bought is no longer available, but it's something like this.
Bam. Cold coffee lovers rejoice!
📺 Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones
Let me help you stop the "what do we watch tonight" dilemma. My wife and I picked up a great, short documentary series called Live to 100. This is all about the areas of the world where there is a significantly higher percentage of centenarians, people who live past 100 years old!
The shocking thing to me was that these people were living life! Not just physically alive. They chopped wood and gardened. They played games with friends. They smiled and laughed.
If you need something quick and easy to watch, it's worth your time this weekend! Watch it here.
📚 Crucial Conversations
Maybe the best book I've read in the past decade is Crucial Conversations, all about how to talk when opinions vary, the stakes are high, and emotions run strong. Sounds helpful, right?
The book delivers on its promise. If you haven't read it, I highly encourage you to pick it up to help your marriage, family, work, and whatever else.
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